Knowing Your Identity Iceberg is the Key to Knowing Yourself
Following on from last month’s blog on Mindset I thought we’d explore a little more by looking at how our Identity, Values, Beliefs and Skills affect our Actions, Behaviours and Decisions. This is a useful exercise as it helps us to understand ourselves better and learn why we react in the ways that we do, to the situations that we find ourselves in. It also helps to explain why, despite setting goals and targets we don’t always achieve them and how we can change that outcome.
This image can be used to help us understand ourselves better and how our “softer” parts, the bits below the waterline, affect the “logic” parts, the bits above the waterline. The areas above the water being the parts that people see of us. Only a very small part of us as whole human beings is visible to others.
So when we are unable to get something done our usual reaction is to focus on our behaviour , which is the effect. Instead, what we should be doing is working out the reason for our behaviour.
I’m sure you’ve been in the following situation, setting out to complete a task, one you know that if you did consistently would bring you the reward you’re after. Yet you never get round to completing it. An example of this could be doing your cold calls, most of the business owners I know, myself included, procrastinate over doing this! Why is this? It could be that we don’t have the skill to speak on the phone, so we need to learn the skill, or that we have a belief that we won’t be any good at it and that it will be a waste of time. ‘I AM’ statements can help here, have a look at my IVVM post.
Our Behaviour is influenced by our Environment – where we grew up, our parents, siblings, teachers, coaches, extended family and our experiences, also where we work and whether it is organised or untidy and has good light for example. It is from our Environment that we develop our Identity. Our Identity leads us to develop our system of Values. Our Values in turn influence our Beliefs, and our Beliefs, these can be positive, or negative and can help us move forward, or hold us back, moving forward may help us identify new skills we need to develop, these could be people or ‘technical’.
Just in the same way that 90% of an iceberg lies below the waterline 90% of who we are lies within us, in the form of identity, values, beliefs and skills.
So in summary, we are represented externally through our Behaviour, which is influenced by Actions and Decisions, which ultimately translates into Results. If we are not achieving our Results then we need to look at our Actions and Decisions. If dissatisfied with our Actions and Decisions then we need to turn our attention to our Behaviour. If our Behaviour is causing us a problem then we need to look internally, or below the surface, to find out what is leading us to achieve less than we want. The reason will be down to either our Skills, Beliefs, Values, or Environment. Once we know what’s holding us back, we can take the necessary steps and overcome the challenge.
So from me to you, make the decision today, to commit yourself to focusing on what is causing you to hold yourself back ‘getting in your own way’, ‘self sabotage’.
Once you commit to this approach you will begin to establish the foundation to achieve all that you want.
If something above the water needs to change you need to change something below the water first. So what do you need to change? Need some help? Then give me a call 07952 112432 or drop me an email kathybassett@actioncoach.com and let’s arrange a conversation.
